I Trust You
by Fluticorns
Summary: Haymitch and Katniss return to District 12 at the end of Mockingjay. When Haymitch tries to rape Katniss one night they realize they both need to heal and make a promise to help each other. They find out they need a lot more than friendship to keep their promise. Hayniss Aberdeen! Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games (I wish I did) this is written for enjoyment only.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

It was me and Haymitch now. There were a few others but they lived in the normal part of the district. Only Haymitch and I were in the Victors Village. He actually stopped by once a day, sometimes twice, until today. When he hadn't shown up by sunset I knew there was something wrong.

I went over to his house for once. I hadn't been there since the quell and it hadn't gotten any cleaner. Empty bottles, trash, old food, and stale vomit was all over the floor and counters. There was a clean couch and recliner. That was it.

"Haymitch!" I yelled. "Haymitch are you here?!"

No answer. I cautiously climbed the stairs to the one part of his house I had never been in.

"Haymitch! Are you okay?!"

He didn't respond. I nervously peeked around a door, and found myself looking at Haymitch. He was sprawled on his bed, empty bottles surrounding him, a full one in his hand.

"Worried about me were you sweetheart?" He slurred.

Haymitch never slurred. The man had built up some resistant to the normal side effects of alcohol. No hangovers. No slurring. Nothing. He had to be incredibly drunk.

"Haymitch, how much did you have to drink?" I asked.

He shrugged.

I tried again, "Why are you drinking this much?"

"Nightmares. Really... really... goddamn bad nightmares."

"Okay that's enough of that," I said, trying to pull the bottle from his grasp.

Haymitch snarled shoving me across the room. "If you're getting my drink, I better get something in return."

His body was pressed against mine, pinning me against the wall. For someone who spent the last two decades practically drinking himself to death he was surprisingly strong. He held my arms above my head, my wrists held in one hand as he used his other hand to shove my face upward and push my head to the wall. He smiled cruelly.

"Well Katniss what do you have to say?" He growled.

I couldn't breath. Haymitch leaned in to whisper in my ear.

"You took my drink and since you don't have anything I want well... I'll take you. I think I want that actually, very much." His voice was deep and gravelly. "Very much sweetheart."

It took several moments for the meaning of his words to sink in.

"Oh god! Haymitch!" I cried struggling.

"Go on. Put up a fight. I'll just tie you down and do it that way. Your choice."

"Haymitch you're drunk! You're drunk!" I screamed.

Tears dripped from my eyes. Haymitch leaned forward kissing me roughly, bruising my lips. I felt his rough stubble and soft hair. He tasted of alcohol. I went limp hoping I could get him to a position where I could fight him off. I only gave him more of an advantage.

He straddled me as I lay on my back on his floor. "What's your genius plan now Katniss?"

I kissed him. There, that was my genius plan.

"Nice try," He smiled.

"Haymitch please! Please it's me! Katniss! You're drunk! Please!" I begged.

He grabbed a full bottle and drank half of it in one gulp. It put him over the edge I think. Haymitch collapsed onto me out cold.

I pushed him off and stood shakily, trembling. Haymitch was going to be out for a while. My body couldn't process what had happened. I left Haymitch on the ground and went downstairs to lay on his couch.

My mentor had tried to rape me. It all happened so fast. I had... trusted him. Trusted he'd never become an alcoholic monster.

Trusted. The only people I ever trusted were Prim, Gale, and Peeta. And Haymitch. Gale betrayed me, Peeta was gone, and Prim... oh sweet Prim... was gone in an entirely different way. And Haymitch. Haymitch. I let out a sob. I trusted him even more than anyone else.

Trust was a terrible thing. Look at the people who trusted me. Finnick, Prim, Peeta, Rue. The memories flooded my mind filling it with all the pain I had caused, all the death. I covered myself in a semi-clean blanket and cried.

And when I finally slept I had nightmares of mutts that became Rue, and Finnick, and Annie telling me I should have died not them, or the one they loved. I thrashed around until I lay sprawled on the ground with tears staining my face.

That was the way I was the next morning when Haymitch found me.

* * *

When I woke up Haymitch was kneeling over me tears dripping from his eyes.

"Are you trying to drown me?" I asked.

He only cried harder.

"Haymitch? What's wrong?" I whispered softly. My hand stretched out to take his hand but he pulled it away.

"I can't... can't believe I did that! Oh Katniss I'm so sorry! So sorry!" He sobbed. "You should go. I'm obviously not safe to be around. Not safe at all."

I looked up at my mentor and I realized for the first time that he was as broken as I was. Probably more. He'd survived his own games and then watched tributes die for over two decades unable, unwilling to help them because he knew dying in the arena was better than living. He knew that there are worse things than death.

"That wasn't you Haymitch. That was the alcohol. All alcohol." I said.

"Exactly and I am always drunk. Katniss I don't want that to happen again. You need to go. I am always, always drunk!" He yelled.

I flinched and sat up.

"Glad you finally noticed! I noticed the day of my reaping, when you took the tumble off the stage. Remember? And in case you haven't noticed we are the only people in this part of town. You're my only friend here! That is why I'm staying! I am going to make sure that you ease up on the booze Haymitch! If it kills me I will get you dry! What if it had been, I don't know Prim, or my mother, or some random girl. This isn't just about me!"

"Katniss in case you didn't notice your sister is dead! I will hurt you if you stay here!"

"No you won't." I hissed.

"What?"

"You won't. You will never be that drunk again. I am going to stay here, clean up your goddamn house and get you dry if I have to be raped a hundred times to get it done. Despite what you may think Haymitch I want you to live. No one else understands but you! No. One."

He looked at me like I'd just grown wings, wait I already did that, like I'd just asked him to kill me. I stared him straight in the face.

"You'd help me get dry? After what I tried to do to you?" He stopped crying long enough to sniffle and wipe his nose on his sleeve.

"You're my friend. You helped me survive. Now it's my turn to help you."

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**Any advice would be great! This is the first fanfiction I've written so I'm not sure if I'm doing everything right. Hope you enjoy:)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to everyone who favorited, commented, or followed my story. I really appreciate it especially the comments. Thanks:)**

* * *

I was going to make him better. I hated him more often than not, but I understood him in a way no one else could. Carefully I stood and helped him up. Haymitch spread his arms out as if asking for a hug but not wanting to touch me, unless I gave him permission. I wrapped my arms around him and he let out a small shudder. I could feel his tears, cold on my scalp.

"I'm so sorry Katniss. So sorry."

"I'm still a virgin Haymitch. You didn't exactly succeed in anything more than scaring me." I reminded him.

There was an unspoken promise passed between us in that moment. A deal. If I could help him stop drinking he would help me get over Prim... and Rue, and Finnick and everyone else who made the mistake of trusting me.

"Ok sweetheart."

We hugged a moment longer before Haymitch and his alcoholic ways had to go and ruin the moment. He shoved me away before kneeling on the ground and vomiting violently.

"Oh god! My head!" he moaned.

It was a photo worthy moment. Haymitch with a hangover consisting of more than just vomiting. I would have laughed except for how serious this was. He was going to kill himself in a week at this rate.

He emptied the alcohol in his stomach onto the floor. Luckily this part was hardwood not carpet so it would be an easy cleanup later. Unfortunately I got hit with the splatter. Plus I had become something of a sympathy vomiter since the quell. My whole dinner came up, which luckily wasn't much. I was still a little depressed, you know losing your little sister tends to do that to people.

"Are you okay?" Haymitch asked.

"I'm fine. You on the other hand need a shower."

Haymitch was covered in vomit, mine and his. He looked down at himself and gave me a weak smile. Standing carefully he stumbled around for a moment then tripped over the couch and face planted on the ground.

"And help up to the bathroom apparently," I grinned.

"No, no. I'm fine," Haymitch insisted.

Ignoring him I put his arm over my shoulders to help him up the stairs. Once we were in the bathroom I turned on the shower.

"Do you think you can take it from here?" I asked.

"Katniss, I think everyone knows about your squeamishness when it comes to naked men, and women for that matter." Haymitch gave me a wry smile.

I shuddered remembering Johanna after our interviews the day before the quarter quell would begin. That was high on the list of experiences I never wanted to repeat, which is saying something since items on the list included, being strangled by Peeta, watching Rue die, watching Prim die, the games, etc.

I left Haymitch to shower glad that he was making at least a few jokes again. It was sad really. He would probably never make jokes about my kissing, or use the rough humor he usually did, not anymore. Never again. Not after last night.

I collapsed down to the floor outside the bathroom and buried my face in my hands. Tears streamed from my eyes as I rocked back and forth. I never realized how much I loved his rude remarks and teasing. Haymitch had changed forever.

A loud shattering sound emanated from the bathroom.

"Haymitch? Are... are you okay?" I called choking on my tears as I did.

He moaned, "No."

"Are you decent?" I asked standing up and wiping away tears.

When he didn't respond I cracked open the door and nervously peeked inside. Haymitch was laying on the ground in only his black pants. It appeared that he'd succeeded in halfway undressing before falling and knocking down a mirror. I pulled the door open the rest of the way.

Fragments of glass were scattered on the floor. Haymitch's face and chest each had several ugly slices. One reminded me of Clove and when she threw the knife slicing open my forehead. Then Thresh saved me. And just like that I was back in the arena.

Running for Peeta's medicine and grabbing it. Clove's knife making a ragged cut on my forehead and hot, sticky blood pouring into my eye, blinding me. She was on top of me now telling me she'd kill me like they killed Rue. Thresh pulled her off slamming her into the Cornucopia over and over and over until a snap, then a cannon signaled her death. He told me he wouldn't kill me, for Rue.

"Katniss! Katniss!" Haymitch called. His voice was echoey and muted like Caesar Flickerman's was during my first interview.

And just like that I was in Haymitch's bathroom again. He was holding me upright which was ironic because he could hardly stand himself. Air filled my lungs as I drew in a ragged breath.

"Are you okay? I heard something falling." I asked. Then I frowned down at his hand. He was obviously trying to support me while also touching me as little as possible.

"I broke the mirror. Sorry, you can't do your makeup now."

Another joke.

Haymitch went to brush away a tear that had dripped down my cheek during my little flashback but dropped his hand. I wiped it off myself.

"Now you're covered in blood and vomit, not just vomit." I said. "Since you obviously can't be trusted to shower yourself get in the shower."

He looked at me curiously.

"It's not a crime to shower with your pants on." I sighed exasperated.

"No. Just weird."

As he climbed into the shower I couldn't help but notice how muscular his upper body was. For a drunk he was in good shape. Still thin, presumably because he couldn't cook, he had sculpted muscles on his chest and obvious power in his arms.

There was another thud as Haymitch spouted a stream of curses. I sighed inwardly and slid the shower curtain to one side. He was sitting on the bottom of the tub trying to reach the soap while unable to stand. I passed the bottle of shampoo down to him from the top shelf.

"Thanks," he muttered. I think he was embarrassed.

I grabbed his hand and helped him stand again. Almost immediately he slipped so I took off my father's hunting jacket and got into the shower with him to keep him steady.

Since I was already soaking wet, I took my hair out of it's braid and washed it. It was greasy and knotted and I realize just how badly I had been taking care of myself since Prim's death. This was only my second shower since our return to District 12. Even when we lived in the Seam I bathed at least once every few days. Sometimes it was nothing more than a quick dip in the crick but I never laid in bed for weeks moving only to drink and never bathing.

Haymitch managed to wash his hair and scrub all the vomit off himself without further incident. I shut off the shower for him and helped him out of the tub.

"Turn around," he ordered.

I did so without question. I trusted him.

"Okay." He said.

When I turned back around he'd taken off his black pants and wrapped a towel around his waist. He handed me a fluffy white towel.

"I'll just uh... go change I guess," he muttered.

"Uh yeah, okay."

This was getting awkward. We looked at each other for a moment longer before I opened the door for him. There was a thud and more swearing as Haymitch made a highly undignified exit from the bathroom and crossed the hall to his room. Rolling my eyes I shut the door behind him.

I took my wet clothes off and threw them into the tub. I opened the bathroom closet because at my house I kept clothes in it

"Damn!" I whispered looking in to find nothing.

I'd forgotten I wasn't in my own house and now I had no change of clothes, it was snowing out, and I was at Haymitch's house with nothing but a towel to cover up in. Damn.

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**Hope you liked this chapter. I would love to hear from you. I'll try to update again soon but my first finals ever are coming up so I'm going to try to focus on those for a bit. Thanks guys.**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm just going to apologize in advance for the ending of this chapter. Promise I'll have more up soon. Thank you all again for reading, hope you enjoy.**

* * *

"Um... Haymitch!?" I yelled.

It took him a moment to respond, "Yes sweet- I mean Katniss."

His response was sarcastic until he seemed to remember who he was talking to.

"You know, I liked you better when you were rude and sarcastic. Any chance we can go back to that? Nothing needs to change between us. Does it?" I shouted back.

"What?" For once Haymitch actually sounded shocked.

"You were better when you were rude and sarcastic! Stop trying to be Peetaish!"

"If that's what you want sweetheart."

His voice had already gained the undertones of sarcasm.

"Thank you." I yelled back, just as sarcastic as him.

I could hear Haymitch's laughter growing louder as he approached the door.

"Need some help in there?" He asked with his best Finnick voice.

"Actually yes." I answered. "Not like that though...well I probably do... but not now.. or ever or... forget it. Right now I have a clothing problem. Since I had to help a certain alcoholic friend stand in the shower my clothes are soaked and I have no other clothes. Any suggestions?"

Haymitch roared with laughter. "You could walk around my house naked."

"HAYMITCH!" I shouted.

"Sorry... was that too much?" He asked regretfully.

"If you were kidding, no."

"Okay. I can run to your house and get you something." Haymitch suggested.

"It was kinda icy when I came over yesterday. You'll probably slip and die if you can't even stand in the shower."

"True... One second."

Haymitch's footsteps retreated down the hall and a few moments grew louder. The door cracked open and I made a high pitched squeaking sound jumping back and pulling the towel up.

"Easy. My eyes are closed and I'm not even looking around the door," he chuckled. "Here."

His arm reached around the door holding a few shirts, his shirts.

"Thank you," I said, taking the shirts and closing the door.

After I took a blow drier and dried my undergarments, as I buttoned on one of Haymitch's shirts. I became consciously aware of two things. One, Haymitch's shirt barely covered my butt. Then again I had been in the games so I didn't doubt Haymitch had seen a lot more of me than was currently exposed. The old Capitol was very anti-privacy. But that was on a screen, this was in person. I would just have to find a blanket and cover up I guess.

Second, the shirt smelled like Haymitch. Not like alcohol or sweat but like... what Haymitch probably smelled like on the few days he was sober. Honey, a little bit of alcohol, and spice. Mostly honey. It was actually rather nice.

I left the bathroom and headed down the stairs. Haymitch had changed into new black pants and a rather beat up shirt. He surveyed me up and down.

"See something you like?" I snapped.

"No... well yes... no. But not... you're pretty but not... I'm not trying to eye you up," He stammered.

"You're digging yourself a hole," I smiled ruefully.

"Yeah I am. New topic," Haymitch suggested.

I noticed he'd put bandages on the cuts on his face from the mirror.

"How's Peeta?" I asked as I sat down on the couch.

"He's not any worse... he's not any better either," he answered me, but didn't elaborate.

He was lying about something. I wasn't sure what, but something.

"What are you trying to hide?"

"Nothing," He responded, too quickly.

"Tell me! I know you're lying!" I snapped.

"Katniss!"

"Haymitch! Tell me now or so help me I will dump all your drinks into the snow and tell Ripper not to sell to you! Is Peeta okay?!" I hissed angrily.

Haymitch sighed, knowing the fight was lost.

"Before I tell you, you need to promise to stay calm Katniss. Do you understand?" He relented.

I could only nod, fearing the worst.

"Sweetheart, come here."

This had to be bad. I walked over to Haymitch and he took my hand in his.

"Peeta... well, Peeta hung himself yesterday. He wanted to stay in the Capitol after the war and get better. He was watching TV one day and there must have been some code programmed into it. He went crazy, killed seven people. Two of them were under twelve. When he woke back up... he couldn't deal with the guilt. His guards came in to check on him one morning and he had hung himself with his sheets. He's dead"

I stopped comprehending after "Peeta hung himself". I could only stare at Haymitch, unseeing, unhearing. Peeta was my rock, the piece of me that was pure and good. He was the decent victor, the social victor, the lovable victor. The victor who had only killed someone by accident.

A piece of my heart was gone, a piece of my soul that I could never get back.

I wonder if he thought about me in his last moments. Did he realize that I cared about him... that I needed him? He was so selfish. Not even a note, a picture to remember him by. No call. I would never hear his voice again, never play real or not real again. No more Peeta.

I somehow walked out the door, across the street to my house. Next thing I knew I was dressed in my hunting clothes, walking to Haymitch's house, and grabbing my father's jacket.

"Katniss!" Haymitch called running after me as I walked out his door.

His voice brought me back to the world.

"You! This is your fault! If you had rescued him and not me that day he would never have been hijacked! You promised to keep him safe, but you lied to me! You said you would protect him and you didn't! Maybe I should let you drink yourself to death!" I screamed.

The iron dam holding back my tears threatened to crack, and I turned away.

"Where are you going?" He asked casting his eyes down as if accepting his blame.

"Hunting!" I snapped. "Need anything while I'm out, sweetheart."

Haymitch visibly flinched at the venom my voice oozed.

I made sure to slam the door when I left. Then the tears came hot on my icy skin. And I ran to the one place I could find solitude, the woods.

* * *

I drew the back the arrow. The squirrel stood still, as if smelling the air. It was an easy kill, the arrow went right through its eye. It was my fourth one today so I put it with the others.

A stick snapped behind me and I spun around, arrow nocked and bow string drawn back. I was met with the snarling teeth of a wild dog. I started to release the arrow but... I couldn't.

The dog wanted nothing more than food. It wanted what everyone wanted, what everyone needed. It was innocent, a victim of fate, like Rue, Finnick, Peeta, and the other tributes. And I was done killing innocent things.

I shot the arrow into a tree and dropped the bow into the deepening snow. The dog cocked its head to one side confused and bared its teeth. I sank to my knees, tears spilling from my eyes, down my cheeks, and onto the snow. I'd done terrible things, killed people, and now that Peeta was gone I had no one left to live for. No reason to fight through the guilt and pain.

"Go ahead," I cried. Tears were freezing to my cheek. "Please. Please kill me. I don't deserve to live."

The dog bared its teeth and snarled.

I shut my eyes, "Just kill me."

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**Sorry again about the end. I wouldn't kill off Katniss though... or would I? You never know. More comments equal a faster update. Thanks guys:)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry that took so long guys. Just started new classes at school. Enjoy!**

* * *

I felt the wild dog's hot breath on my cheek and braced myself to die. But there was nothing. If this is what dying is like then I wish I'd done this a lot sooner. Then there was something warm and wet licking my cheek. When I opened my eyes the wild dog stood with its head cocked to one side, staring at me.

"Go ahead."

The dog licked my face, turned, and walked away. I had failed, so I was going to have to keep living... unless I could freeze myself to death. I buried my face into my hands and lay in the snow. Tears streamed from my eyes, because Peeta was gone. And as I fell asleep in the snow I finally realized that Haymitch lied to me that night when he said he was drinking because of nightmares. He was drinking because Peeta was dead.

"Katniss!" A voice bellowed. "Katniss!"

I shivered as I woke up slowly from my nap, the nap I wished had been forever. Just a while more and I'd be dead.

"Katniss!" As the voice grew nearer I could tell it belonged to Haymitch,

I let out a loud sob and heard Haymitch running toward me.

"Damn it! Katniss? Katniss! Come on. Please don't be dead!" He pleaded, shaking me.

My mind was going fuzzy and my vision started to turn black around the edge. I could faintly make out Haymitch taking his coat off, just before I felt it around my shoulder. He lifted me into his arms carefully.

"Please let me die!" I whispered. "Please Haymitch! I have no one left to live for!"

"What about me Katniss? Did you ever consider living for me? I need you," he said.

"You don't understand Haymitch! Prim's dead. Peeta, the boy I thought of as my brother is dead. Gale, I hardly know anymore. My mom, well she's shown she can do fine without me."

"I do understand! The Capitol killed my family too, remember!"

I heard nothing of what he said after that. Everything went black.

* * *

I woke up in a tub filled with hot water. Haymitch had his pants rolled up and feet in the water. His elbows rested on his knees as he stared down at me.

"You gave me quite a scare there sweetheart," he said.

I felt the tears coming, "The wild dog... it... it didn't kill me. It licked my face... and just... just walked away... I asked it to kill me."

Haymitch took my hand.

"Why didn't you just let me die?" I asked softly.

He looked at me.

"Why?" I repeated, more forcefully.

"Katniss... I think... I think I love you, I mean... I'm in love with you." He shook his head disgustedly. "Sorry that's stupid. Hell, that's sick!" He stood angrily, "There's a bathrobe hanging on the door. I'll leave."

I waited until he left to climb out of the tub. Haymitch was in love with me? It was kind of sick, but also sweet? Was that the right word? I didn't know. My mind had yet to thaw. I took off my now wet clothes and pulled on the fluffy pink bath robe.

Across the hall Haymitch's bedroom door was slightly ajar. He was in there making his bed with clean sheets.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you earlier. It wasn't your fault," I apologized.

"It's okay. I'm just glad you're still alive," he answered.

He pulled back the sheets and lifted me into bed. Then he pulled up the covers and tucked them around my shoulder.

"Goodnight sweetheart." He said, turning and walking out the door.

"Haymitch," I called after him. "Thank you... for saving me."

"We seem to be making a habit of it," he chuckled.

* * *

I lay buried under covers, shivering. The snow had chilled me to the bone. There was a creaking sound as the door cracked open and I steadied my breathing, pretending to be asleep. Haymitch's heavy steps came nearer and I shivered slightly.

"Katniss. I love you, and I'm sorry about Peeta and Prim and everyone. I'm sorry that I'm old and irritable and drunk all the time. I wish," he paused. "I wish you could love me the way you loved Peeta."

Obviously Haymitch thought I was asleep. I shivered again. Haymitch was in love with me, I wasn't hallucinating earlier when I got out of the tub.

Then the covers moved slightly and I felt the bed move. Haymitch's body was pressed against my back radiating heat like a fire.

"Goodnight sweetheart," Haymitch whispered.

I smiled, surprised with his sudden need for me to live. Maybe I did have a purpose in life after all. Ironically the man whose advice was always 'stay alive' in a sarcastic manner actually wanted me to stay alive.

I felt Haymitch's chest fall into a steady rhythm as he drifted into sleep and I turned to look at him. He looked years younger. All the seriousness gone from his face. Relaxed. Laying down, and sleeping completely sober. I think it was a new thing for him.

I ran my fingers through his hair. It was soft and silky. He hadn't shaved recently, and there was rough stubble lining his jaw. Smiling, I snuggled into his arms and fell asleep.

* * *

For the first time in over two years my dreams were free of nightmares. And I realized, it wasn't Gale who had been keeping me from Peeta... it was Haymitch.

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**Comments are always appreciated!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I am very sorry it took me so long to update I had auditions for band to focus on but now I promise to update as regularly as I possibly can. Love you all! Leave comments.**

* * *

I lay next to Haymitch, completely still, thinking about my nightmares, or lack there of. Peeta and Prim had helped keep my nightmares away before, now they were both dead. And Haymitch was taking over for them now.

"Morning sweetheart," Haymitch murmured sliding away from me.

" Good morning," I answered softly. I turned so I was looking at him, "I am truly sorry Haymitch. I never thought you... it was all so sudden, I mean... you encouraged a relationship between Peeta and I but... I don't know."

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that, especially then," he answered. "I've liked you ever since you volunteers for your sister. It just drew me to you I guess."

"It was just so sudden and so unexpected."

"Yeah, I know."

"I didn't have any nightmares. Not one," I smiled

"Neither did I Katniss. Neither did I," Haymitch smiled at me.

"I could never have a relationship with Peeta because of someone else. I thought it was Gale but it was... you. Since you fell off the stage, it was always you," I whispered.

He stroked my face softly, "I'm 42 Katniss. You're 18. I grew up with your mother."

"Age is just a number that is supposed to define us. It doesn't have to," I answered.

He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. "You need to stop being \right all the time."

"Maybe you just need to stop being wrong," I responded and smiled a smile that went to my eyes for the first time in a long time.

* * *

Over the course of several weeks Haymitch and I managed to move all my stuff from my house into his house and clean it all up. I don't think we went out of the Victor's Village in that whole time we were so busy cleaning.

Then, Haymitch flicked on the TV to check on the state of the new Capitol. Unsurprisingly, Plutarch was giving a report.

"In other news," he was saying, "As far as we know the Mockingjay, Katniss Everdeen, is still in a state of deep depression. As many people have often forgotten the tributes who were once forced into the arena were children. and our young bird is only 18. Katniss if you are watching we all send you our deepest gratitude and respect for what you have done, as well as regret for what you have lost."

I bit my lip, remembering how I had done it for Rue, how Prim and my mother and the rest of the District had done it for me. How that simple gesture put into action the entire revolution. And I realized that these people respected me. More than Coin, or Plutarch, or Snow, or even Boggs. To them I was the leader of the rebellion.

But I didn't want to be. It had cost people their lives. Prim was dead, Peeta was dead, Finnick dead. I felt the tears rolling down my cheeks and brushed them angrily away. It was in the past.

Haymitch looked over at me sitting on the couch and came over to sit next to me.

"What the matter sweetheart?" He asked, pulling me into his arms.

I buried my face in his chest, snotting up his shirt. "I killed them," I whispered. "I killed them all."

"Oh Katniss. No you didn't. I promise you, none of this was your fault."

"Without me there would have been no rebellion! Prim would be alive. Peeta would be alive, I should have just... just eaten the damn berries." I choked.

"Then what? Peeta sends his kids to the reaping. Every mother sends their children to the reaping. The survivor gets what? To be used as a prostitute like Finnick? Watch kids from their district die every year!? Don't you see Katniss? We needed this. If it wasn't you it would have been someone else. Maybe someone who couldn't bring such a quick end to the war." Haymitch hissed.

People had told me this before, that the newfound freedom was worth the sacrifice. But it had never clicked until Haymitch said it. Maybe Prim would have been reaped again, or her children, my children. Finnick and Annie's son perhaps.

"Thank you Haymitch." I sat up leaving his arm wrapped around my waist.

"Not a problem sweetheart. You see? I can be right, sometimes that is."

"Not very often," I joked.

He made a face at me. "How are the nightmares?" He asked. I'd been sleeping in his bed while he slept on the floor. Close enough to drive away the worst nightmares. Far enough away that we were both comfortable.

"Better. Yours?"

Haymitch had drank a total of one bottle of alcohol in the last few week, none in the last week.

"Shh!" He answered and turned up the volume on the TV.

Plutarch was ending the program. "Before I leave you for lunch it has been requested that I announce a new show coming soon. In commemoration of the Hunger Games and to remind us that such terror should never again be repeated, Effie Trinket has volunteered to create this new program. To honor not only those who died in the arena, but also those who fell at the hands of the Capitol the show will be called 'Remember the Fallen'. That's all for today. See you tomorrow from 11 to noon, as always. Have a great day."

Haymitch and I turned and looked at each other.

"I never expected that." He gaped.

Tears threatened to spill from my eyes again. "This is beautiful. It's like... they're honoring everyone who was ever forced to give their lives in the games."

I stood up and slipped into my hunting boots and my father's jacket.

"I need to get outside. I'm going hunting. Want to come with me?" I asked Haymitch.

"After that stunt you pulled last time you went hunting you seriously think I'd let you go alone? Of course I'm coming."

"Then you'd better hurry up."

The last thing I saw before I shut the door was Haymitch tripping over a chair in his hurry and falling flat on his face.

* * *

"Is it physically impossible for you to be any quieter?" I whispered to him after he scared away a deer and several turkeys. "How did you possibly survive your games making this much noise. It's like Peeta."

Haymitch grinned at me sheepishly. I pointed up through the trees to a squirrel and motioned for him to shut up and stay still. Luckily for the squirrel a bigger piece of game came prancing through the forest at that moment. I aimed at the deer, released the arrow, and it was dead before it knew what hit it.

"Nice," Haymitch said.

"I'm going to need help to get this thing to the new Hob," I answered.

"There's a new Hob?" He asked.

"Yeah kinda. The building got pretty much rebuilt over the remains of the old one. It's smaller but it works. I've only been there once since we got back."

* * *

Greasy Sae was glad to see me out and about.

"Katniss! Oh how are you! I've been meaning to stop by but I just keep forgetting. I'm old you know!" She greeted us. "And Haymitch... are you... sober?"

"Yes I am, thank you for noticing," He responded gruffly.

"Well Ripper is not going to be happy." she chuckled. "Anyway. Katniss I suppose you have something for me?"

"Oh yes. There's a deer just outside the doors. It's yours if you want it," I answered, not really paying attention. This place looked more like a market and less like a black market. It was a good change I think.

"Oh dear, are you sure?"

"Yes of course. I don't need the money and well I don't have... well... you know."

Greasy Sae smiled tenderly at me. "Prim and Gale are both very proud of you I am sure." Then she leaned in closer. "Besides Haymitch will need some taking care of."

For an old woman she was surprisingly perceptive.

"We aren't-" I started.

"Not yet Katniss. Not yet."

"If you two are done..." Haymitch grinned.

"Bye Sae. Thank you." I said walking away.

"Thank you Katniss!" She called after me. "Good luck with him!"

"So are we an official item now?" Haymitch asked as we walked home wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

I smiled up at him. "Yes we are indeed."

* * *

**This is not the end of this story. More is coming. Promise. As always I would love comments. They make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And since it's almost valentines day and I still have no boyfriend I can use the warm and fuzziness to pretend I have a boyfriend. **


	6. Chapter 6

"If we are a couple, that means I can do this..." Haymitch knelt down and gathered a ball of snow in his hands. Then he threw the snow into my face. A high pitched squeaking sound emanated from my throat.

"What the hell was that for?" I yelled.

He looked at me, his eyebrows knitting together, "You've never had a snowball fight?"

"No." I hissed in irritation.

"You have got to be kidding me! Just-"

"Do this?" I smiled and threw a ball of snow into his face.

"Yes." He gasped. "Do that."

Haymitch hit me with another snowball. I tackled him into the snow. He rolled me onto my back into a snowdrift and stood up. I shivered in the cold and he pulled me to my feet. I wrapped my arms around him again and he lifted me into his arms.

"Well that was fun."

Haymitch laughed, "Yes it was."

Then he shivered too.

"Let's get inside," I suggested.

* * *

Once again, Haymitch and I showered together with all our clothes on. I still had my phobia of nakedness, and he still was nervous I would suddenly hate him and end our relationship.

After our shower I turned on the TV and stretched out across the couch with the intention of watching something about the new Capitol.

"Katniss. You can't hog the whole couch," Haymitch announced as he came down the stairs.

I sat up dejectedly. He sat down and obviously felt some measure of pity for me. I was exhausted.

"Come here," he sighed.

Smiling, I leaned against him. His strong arm wrapped around my shoulders and I rested my head on his shoulder. My eyelids had just started to droop when the door banged open.

"Here are my two victors! Oh dear, what is going on here?" A voice said.

This was bad. Haymitch and I were currently snuggled up on the couch, something only a couple would do and Effie Trinket had just walked in on it. It could have been worse but still she could knock.

None the less, I was glad to see her.

"Effie!" I practically yelled, jumping to my feet. "How are you? It's been so long!"

I gave her the biggest hug I'd ever given her. She staggered back in shock.

"Well I'm good Katniss. You seem so much better, over Peeta and Prim. I'm so proud!" She gushed.

Haymitch also stood up, "Effie, we... don't mention those names."

"Oh dear. Well that could be an issue," Effie frowned. The two of them stood looking at each other awkwardly for several seconds. Effie's head tilted to the side. "Are you... sober? Katniss what have you done to him."

They hugged too.

"Not that we aren't glad to see you but why are you here?" Haymitch asked pulling away from Effie and taking my hand.

"Can we just talk for a while? As friends? Not everything has to be business between us three." She said smiling ruefully.

"Yeah. Kitchen?" I suggested.

"Is it accessible?" Effie asked, skeptically.

Haymitch and I glanced at each other and laughed.

"Katniss has had me cleaning around the clock," he rolled his eyes.

We all sat around the table. Effie brought inside news about the new Capitol. Apparently the president Paylor wanted to create a way to remember the games and show they should never be repeated. And naturally Effie volunteered to run the show. Plutarch was supposedly engaged but I don't think we particularly cared. I was currently unable to stop reseeing Prim being blown up over and over and over and over and over..

"Sweetheart? Are you okay?" Haymitch asked interrupting my visions. I didn't even realize I was crying.

Once again I buried my face in his chest, the way I did every time a memory started to haunt my mind, which was becoming less and less, as if somehow his chest could burn out the images. And somehow it worked.

"Better now," I answered after several minutes.

"You two," Effie smirked. "Absolutely adorable. Though Katniss you and I will be having a serious discussion about birth control and you are telling your mother about this."

Oh god! My mother. That was not going to go well at all. And what was Effie even talking about, birth control? Haymitch and I weren't... weren't... god not even Peeta and I ever.

"Effie!" Haymitch and I shouted simultaneously.

"I'm just saying!" She said defensively. "Judging by your wet hair you two took a shower at the same time and you smell like the same soap so... just saying."

I scowled at her. "We were completely clothed."

She let it drop but still smiled at us secretively.

"Anyway the reason I'm here is for Paylor's 'Remember the Fallen' show. I'm going to be directing it and I know you two were instrumental in the uprising and knew many of the tributes. I wondered if maybe you two would host the show. You would stay in the Capitol for several months and talk about tributes who gave their lives in the games or to help end them. If you can't I understand but I think everyone wants to see you. Particularly Katniss.." Effie explained.

I felt as if I was being pressed under a rock. Rue, Peeta, Finnick. Remembered, but I would have to stop stifling their memory.

Haymitch gave my hand a squeeze.

"Can we sleep on it?" he asked.

"Of course! The train leaves tomorrow at three so I just need to know by then. And we could always make a stop to visit your mother Katniss... Oh dear look at the time. Already eight."

Even now Effie was a schedule freak.

"You can stay here tonight Effie," I offered.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, it's fine." Haymitch answered.

"And the show is set to air in August so we would have a nice relaxed schedule for the most part." Effie added.

It was then I realized I didn't know the date.

"What is today?" I asked.

Effie thought for a moment. "January 16th."

I had missed several months of my life wallowing in despair.

* * *

I made Effie a bed on the couch and Haymitch and I resumed our regular sleeping arrangements, me in the bed and Haymitch on the floor. I was terrified about Effie's offer, all my emotions about the games being allowed to surface for the first time in weeks. Loud sobs racked my body and I attempted to stifle them so Haymitch didn't hear.

"Sweetheart," He whispered and stood quietly. "What's wrong?"

The bed shifted as Haymitch sat next to me.

"Come on Katniss. Tell me what's wrong."

I turned to face him, "I just... just want to do this so bad. I want to be strong and host this show for Effie. But since she's been here... everything has been worse. All I can think about, every moment is Prim and Peeta and Finnick and-"

"Stop!" Haymitch interrupted. "You keep all these emotions held behind a dam and at some point the dam is going to break and it is going to be terrible because you aren't going to be able to cope with everything at once. That's why I drank so much. If you let the emotions go a little bit at a time eventually you can get better. And, I had no one. Now we have each other and we can go to the Capitol and get better together. Let the dam out slowly if we want to call it that. You can't keep it shut inside you have to talk to someone. You'll become like me. Or dead. Like your wild dog incident."

"I want to... so bad. But I don't think I'm strong enough." I sobbed.

"You are though. You led a revolution"

"Haymitch," I was about to remind him exactly what the revolution cost.

"Let's go together. We can always quit. "

"You really want to go?" I asked.

"I want to make a difference, don't you?"

And I did but I didn't at the same time.

When he saw I wasn't going to answer he said, "I'll let you sleep. Goodnight Katniss."

"Will you stay here, with me?" I asked, nervous he would refuse.

He didn't answer, just crawled under the covers with me, laying on his back. I rested my head on his chest and wrapped my arms around him. He froze, then returned the embrace.

"I'll do it Haymitch, as long as we're together."

* * *

**Thank you all for reading. Please comment! The warm fuzziness comments provide make me feel like I have a boyfriend. Since Valentines day is just a few days away and I am incredibly single I can use all the warm fuzziness. Also if you follow me on Tumblr I will post updates to this story on it. My username is the3fingersalute.**


	7. Chapter 7

"Everyone up! It's a big big day!" Effie trilled marching into the bedroom. "I need- oh goodness!"

Haymitch and I were still laying on the bed exactly like we were last night. He was half asleep, though how he slept through Effie's voice, I wasn't sure.

"Effie the door was closed for a reason," I said.

"Well it's almost noon so you two little love birds need to wake up. If you're coming to the Capitol we need to leave soon."

She pranced out of the room.

"Haymitch. You need to get up. We have to go soon," I whispered softly, sitting up.

He moaned and sat up as well. "Whatever you say sweetheart."

I grabbed some more clothes from the room and headed to the bathroom to change. I was happier than I had been in awhile like a huge weight had been removed from my chest. Talking to Haymitch really had helped. This time my father's jacket was going to the Capitol with me.

I could hear Effie downstairs scolding Haymitch while I showered. Something about the fact that I was only 18 and we were sleeping together. Then Haymitch saying we never 'slept' together we were just laying in bed together. I got dressed and headed down the stairs.

"Katniss I'm so delighted you two are coming with me! This will be so much fun!" Effie gushed.

"Fun Effie? Talking about people we've seen die? Yes, I'm sure that will be fun," I snapped.

"Katniss!" Haymitch warned and because I liked him I listened, for once.

Effie actually looked ashamed of what she said so I gave her a hug and whispered an apology.

"Well then are we all ready to head to the station then?"

Even now she was still a schedule freak.

"Ready," I said.

* * *

The Capitol was as big as I remembered and still made of the same plain concrete as before. As we pulled into the train station, I recognized roads where various pods had exploded. I squeezed Haymitch's hand tightly as we passed the street Boggs had died, feeling my throat constricting in terror.

"Easy Katniss," he whispered reassuringly.

"Well, we are almost there. We will be heading to a center where we have apartments ready for you two. If you'll be needing two," Effie said.

She had narrated practically the whole two day trip which had surprisingly been quite nice. I listened to her drone on and on and was able to forget my own crushing fear of the Capitol and what I associated it with.

The train came to a gentle stop and I stepped into the bright sunlight blinking, still clutching Haymitch's hand.

"Haymitch! Katniss! Come with me right this way!" Effie ordered.

A small crowd was gathering to see why a tribute train had once again arrived at the station. I ignored Effie as usual and looked out at the crowd. Someone pointed at me and slowly silence fell over the entire station as everyone stopped to stare at us. Haymitch put his arm around my shoulders as if telling me he'd watch over me.

Then a little girl, Prim's age, stepped forward and stopped in front of me. She lifted a tiny hand and took my finger and pulled it down, and I knelt down out of Haymitch's comfort.

She was not a Capitol raised child. Even after several month of being well fed, it was obvious this girl had once been a malnourished child from one of the outer districts.

She felt the braid that hung over my shoulder carefully, then looked into my gray seam eyes.

"You're Katniss," she whispered in awe.

I smiled and nodded. A single tear slid down the little girl's face.

"Thank you. If it weren't for you I would have been in the reaping this year," She murmured and wrapped her skinny arms around my neck. "When I grow up I want to be just like you."

This was new. I had never heard someone real thank me before, especially someone I had truly impacted. Tears were welling up behind my eyes as I returned her embrace.

"You know what? When you grow up, don't try to be like me. Be yourself," I whispered in her ear.

She smiled and ran back into the crowd to find her family as quickly as she had appeared.

The whole time no one had spoken or moved. One by one each member of the crowd took their middle three fingers, pressed them to their lips, and raised them in the air. I brushed the tears away from my eyes and hurried out of the station after Effie.

"That was really beautiful Katniss," Haymitch said.

I didn't answer because I was sobbing uncontrollably. Effie gave me a hug and Haymitch joined as we stood in the middle of the street blocking people from walking.

"I love you guys."

"Love you too Katniss," Effie answered.

"Well we all know I love you," Haymitch chuckled and I kicked his shin.

We all pulled away laughing.

Effie straightened her hair and checked the time, "Let's get you two to the suite. There are some very special people waiting,"

* * *

Effie abandoned us at the elevator saying she had to go visit her parents. It never occurred to me that Effie had parents before. I think she wanted to give Haymitch and me elevator time. I hit the elevator summon button thing.

"Katniss!" A scarily familiar voice called.

I spun around and saw Johanna running toward us down the hall. She body slammed me with her violent hug shoving me back into Haymitch, only she could make a hug violent.

"Is this really a legit thing? Haymitch and Katniss? Love really is weird," She laughed as she joyfully squeezed the air from my lungs.

"Yes it is," Haymitch responded just as the elevator announced it's arrival.

Johanna let me go so we could get in.

Johanna. Elevator. Parade. Tree. I thought. But what did that mean- oh, Johanna in the elevator after the parade stripping down because she hated her tree outfit.

"Uh Johanna? Any chance you could leave your clothes on this time?" I asked.

She rolled her eyes. "If I must." Then she laughed so I knew she was kidding.

The elevator arrived at the top floor. Annie stood there holding a baby while Beetee sat on the couch with a little wire trying to fix god only knows what. I really didn't know Annie that well so when she came up and gave me a warm hug I wasn't sure what was happening.

"Thank you Katniss," she whispered in my ear. I knew what she meant. The safety of her child, the fact that she and Finnick we're able to be something.

She stepped back and ushered us deeper into the room. It was a living room area with a connecting dining room and bedrooms connecting to the living room through mini halls.

"This is your guys's room," Johanna said.

"Who else is here?" Haymitch asked.

"Beetee, Johanna, and I. That's it. none of us really wanted to see Enobaria again," Annie answered. "I'm your first guest speaker or whatever."

Guest speaker about...oh no. Our first tribute was Finnick.

Haymitch and I piled our stuff in our room and I glanced over at him.

"I don't think I can talk about Finnick, Haymitch."

I felt his arms around me as I cried into his familiar chest.

"Be strong sweetheart."

* * *

**I am so sorry this took so long to update! I had no idea where I was going with this for awhile but I think I got it now. Also please leave comments, you guys are killing me. Comments help me update faster also btw. And sorry if this chapter was terrible I'm feeling really off. COMMENTS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!**

**PLEASE!**


	8. Authors Note AKA I'm Sorry!

Hi everyone I just want to apologize. My dog died just recently and I have been kind of depressed about it. That combined with school and the play that goes up next week has given me very little time to work on this and I am truly very sorry. Chapter eight is almost done, and I have no schools Friday so it WILL be up by Friday night at the latest. I promise! Again I am very sorry for the wait I will be back with you soon. I love you all so much, thank you for reviewing, following and favoriting me it means a lot and makes my day. Also I've found it is good to have some diversity in the stories I write because it makes everything so much easier. If you want me to do a certain ship please ask via private message and I'll let you know if I can. Love you guys and I'm sorry I'm such a terrible person for not updating. 


	9. Chapter 8

And I was strong, or at least I tried to be. I ate dinner with the group of broken people that had become my friends, even laughing at a few jokes. Not pretend laughter either, but real genuine laughter that seemed to come from a place of happiness inside me that I had forgotten existed. Haymitch had given me the strangest look the first time and everyone had gone silent. Then Johanna started on with stories of how delicious pine needles smell, which brought a rare smile to our faces as we remembered the little bundle I had given her back in district thirteen.

After dinner I watched TV with everyone. It was, for once, not the news but an old movie about a big yellow dog. It was sweet at first, the boy and dog had a special bond and then he killed the dog at the end. I wasn't sure why and I think my lack of understanding came from not knowing what something they called rabies was.

I cried when the movie finished, Johanna looked shocked, Haymitch was hugging me tightly, Annie had gone to tuck in her baby, who was named Finnick Peeta Odair, while Beetee tried to explain what rabies was.

No one cared.

Eventually we all went to our rooms to try to sleep. Just as I felt my eyes drifting into sleep the phone next to my bed rang shrilly.

"Damn it!" I cursed and answered the phone irritably."What!"

"Well aren't you a bundle of sunshine sweetheart," I could practically hear Haymitch rolling his eyes.

"You could have walked across the room rather than calling me," I hissed slamming the phone back down.

He was in the bed nearest the door, claiming that he was keeping me safe. I heard him set his phone down and roll over.

"Sorry," he whispered loudly. "I was going to ask if you wanted to come sleep over here. I'm..."

He trailed off but I knew he was trying to say he was scared to go to sleep, afraid the nightmares would return without me there. It was funny because I felt the exact same way.

I climbed out of bed and into his. curling up against him. His arms wrapped around me.

"Goodnight," I whispered.

He was already asleep.

* * *

Effie's schedule obsessiveness knew no bounds. She and my prep team were in our room no later than six am setting up. There was the torture of body hair being forcibly removed from my body, but getting to watch Haymitch squirm while Flavius tried to pluck his eyebrows was quite amusing, then makeup and hair. All the while Effie stood to the side and went through the day's schedule no less than four times.

"First we will record you two doing an introduction from eight to nine," she flipped through her papers. "Then you two will have a short interview with Annie about Finnick and Mags. You two can give your personal piece about them after her and then we will add in the clip of Finnick from district thirteen. then you two need to talk about... Peeta all from nine to ten thirty. This will be airing tonight and since Finnick was one of the favorites, Mags was famous for volunteering for Annie, and Peeta was... well Peeta. This segment will kick off the show."

She paused to breathe. I tried not to cry and I think Effie did too.

"Then I have some cushion time added in from ten thirty until eleven in case something goes wrong. At eleven we will record the episode that will air next week, Wiress and Blight. That will go to one. At one we will have an hour and a half for lunch and then there is another half hour of cushion time."

Haymitch sighed, obviously bored by Effie's unceasing chatter.

"Lastly at three we will record," she glanced over at me and I braced myself knowing what was coming. "Rue's and Prim's."

I could not cry now, it would ruin the makeup Octavia had so carefully applied.

Haymitch reached over and squeezed my hand. I loved when he did that. It was so comforting.

My prep team dressed Haymitch is a suit, as usual, while I got a pretty blue dress. It came down to my ankles, and flared out, not unlike my first interview dress. Not Cinna's work but definitly his design.

* * *

"This is the opening to the first episode ever everyone so we need silence for Haymitch and Katniss." The room fell silent.

Haymitch and I were on the stage usually controlled by Ceasar Flickerman during the tribute interviews.

"And action in 3... 2... 1."

I was supposed to start but I couldn't find the words, so I used Gale's.

"A friend of mine said to me once 'They root for their favorites, they cry when they get killed. It's sick.' That was the morning of the reaping for the 74th Hunger Games. Not one Capitol citizen knew what we went through out there in that arena, not one Capitol citizen realizes that if they were in a different place their son or daughter could be being murdered on television. You never put yourselves in the shoes of everyone in the Districts. You never cared..." I trailed off, unsure of how to continue.

"We want to show you why you should care, we want you to remember the children in the arena." Haymitch's voice boomed, surprisingly powerful. "Katniss didn't kill Marvel, you did. Marvel didn't kill Rue, the game makers did. Cato didn't kill Thresh and Thresh didn't kill Clove, every citizen of Panem that encouraged the games did. So remember the children you sent to slaughter, remember those who sacrificed themselves for you in the war, remember the Fallen."

Cameras stopped recording as Haymitch finished and lights came up. Effie stood in silence with tears running down her face along with several other members of the crew.

She composed herself quickly.

"No need for a second take on that, Annie come on in." She ordered.

Finnick's was not a terrible as I had expected. Annie talked about how amazing he was. The way he had always loved her no matter what her mental state. How good of a father he would have been if he had the chance.

She cried a little and I gave her a gentle hug. It was nice to be the one who was providing comfort rather than the one who was being comforted for once.

"I hope you all remember what he gave for you. Without him Katniss wouldn't have lived and you would still be enslaved to Snow. He was not just a pretty face. He was a man," she finished with tears streaming silently down her face.

Haymitch was smiling sadly off to the side and I gave his hand a little squeeze, surprisingly feeling a lot stronger than this morning. I gave my piece on him, how he had protected me and been my friend no matter what, and Haymitch, always a man of few words, only said that he was a great friend.

"That's a wrap!" Effie called. "Take five and we'll do Peeta."She looked overjoyed at this whole day, even though it had only been a few hours so far.

Five short minutes later we were back and ready to record.

For the first time since my relationship with Haymitch began I felt unfightable panic rising in my throat. My breaths came out short and ragged. Haymitch looked at me with worry etched across his face. My hand was trembling as I sat in the seat.

Haymitch grabbed it gently trying to steady me.

"I can't... I can't!" I sobbed unable to see anything but Peeta lying lifeless in the arena. Peeta's bloody leg. Peeta being tortured by Snow. Peeta strangling me. Peeta calling me a mutt.

Then I stood up and ran from the room.

* * *

**I hope you all saw the note I left for you. Really I'm sorry for the wait. As always thank you to everyone who reviewed, favorited, or followed this story. Special thanks to everyone who said they were sorry for the loss of my dog. That truly means a lot to me. **

**In other news there will probably be only a few more chapters and then an Epilogue. But I love writing fanfiction and this is my first and only one so I wanted to do another. If you have any suggestions I would love to hear from you! I was considering a Dramione but I am not sure. I'll keep you updated. 3  
**

**Also please review I love when people do that. If you write fanfiction you know how amazing it feels to get a review and it honestly helps motivate me to update faster.**

**Anyway, have a great day! **


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